Why Is Conformity So Satisfying?
I have been fortunate enough to take a walk these days in the park next to my house. For about 6 months, that 1 hour stroll aided and abetted the perfect escape from the 4 walls of a home, mechanically functioning in its definition of life. People knew their roles, the residents and the maids played their part splendidly in a choreographed orchestra defined and executed to perfection.
It seems, when you examine human beings very closely, even if they are conditioned to be treated special by you owing to them being the people who raised you and played some part in defining who you are, it is quite evident, that for them, the role they play within the 4 walls is the start and the end of their definition of what life is. I am not trying to be condescending at all. In fact to each their own. There are people who strive to have kids their whole lives and when they do, for them, their purpose of life is fulfilled. There are people who want their own house, slowly waiting for money and time to turn in their favor so that they can leave a legacy. A few months back, for me, a diluted life energy like mine, would have said – “Life is about getting a job, finding someone to marry and then the rest follows”. Unfortunately, I do not see it that simplistically anymore.
When you go through a time in your life when you have been able to muster the money you wanted to, to sustain yourself physically, and identified the person you love, saying to yourself, that you will not marry another, because for you marriage has to be with the person you and they are comfortable with, it seems quite futile to see that there is so much more to be done and so little envisioned till date. While the relationships we have with parents, partners, friends, acquaintances matter, what seems to be quite a challenge for human beings in the 21st Century is to step outside the realm of their mobile phones, iPad and Computers and step out into nature. Not a far of place but to experience the wind blowing into the leaves on the trees outside ones own window sill.
The park that I was talking about has been a fascination for me. It no longer is an escape from the identities we carry, but that ‘me’ is the core me. That is at the center of who I am. In fact, I would go as far as to say that if I had not had the brain of a human being but that of a Humpback Whale, a Sea Lion or an Eagle, I would have been a much better fit for this life. Sounds absurd doesn’t it?
Think of it this way, every day, an hour stroll in the park, looking at trees helps me ponder whether a tree, a full grown tree has ever complained about a squirrel taking shelter inside the hole in its trunk, the insects that thrive on their branches, the birds that build a nest on its shoulders and the monkeys which climb from trunk to trunk to eat the very insects which thrive gorgeously. And while all of this beautiful activity is happening around us, we are stuck in our limited thought processes branding people worthy, unworthy all around us. The self-centredness in the belief of the self construct in the society around us, which is us, is so defined by our own human nature. And while one manages to change, the expectation that the other would change too is a futile expectation of reciprocation. We are so prone to all sorts of violence that we have learnt to rationalize it every second of the day. The disparity in human beings is stark, the self-centredness in the concept of knowing ones self-worth is at the root of all the problem.
All of this observation, has somehow directed me to my new ambition. An ambition which seeks to leave most of my conditioned past behind and start off on a new journey. I have been fortunate enough to muster the knowledge of a good diction in English and therefore writing and expressing ones thoughts through a story, a song or a poem is what I wish to do and I have acted on doing as I speak. This alone brings purpose to my life momentarily. Here I do not seek reciprocation. I wish to share with everyone the beauty I see in the limited capacity I have and if anyone wishes to take part in it, so be it.
If you have seen the tremendous team work and lack of territorial behavior within humpback whales, their beautiful P-shaped bubble breathing to eat krill, their breeching to play and communicate with one another without harming the other. The sustainability it fosters, the life lessons it teaches, if only everyone of us can be listening and opening our eyes to it. In fact, I do not blame people at all, everyone awakens at their own time and no one can force it like you cannot force another to love you. It just happens. Conformity to the ways we know is very satisfying because it helps us feel good in front of society, but it is a perpetuation of self-centredness that we are all complacent in. And we somehow find it satisfying because it makes spending time much easier. The question is, do we want life to be easy or fulfilling?